Okay, so please take the following thoughts objectively and always remember that this is my *personal* thought, so don't come up and spank me in the ass telling me not to think this way.
Lately I've been so cought up with enormous college work and other activities. I pretty much spend my days either researching for my projects, do drawings or models for my projects (just in case, I'm an interior design student), practicing with my band (we play almost every week at a cafe), skateboarding, bboying, reading, and hangin out with my girlfriend. Now there you don't see the word magic in my list of activities, simply because I just feel like I don't have enough time to put into practice. All this actually kinda started when I had my practical training last semester which pretty much took ALL my time for work (wake up, work, go back, sleep, repeat).
Now I'm not here to complain about my daily life or my good life, but rather... I've been wondering, where is the drive that used to make me forget everything and practice magic? Where's that push? But most of all, where's that surprise and awe that I used to get when I see magic? Granted, I still do practice a little and flourish, but well, I wouldn't really call em practice if they're just fiddling around and don't actually advance my skills to a whole new level.
Yes it takes practice and patience, and believe me I've been in the same situation before (where I decided to take a backseat for awhile), but I saw things and made my blood boil to the point I started practicing like mad again. But I haven't seen or experience new things that would get me to that place again. I mean, forgive me for sounding snobbish or obnoxious, magic is awesome and it has continued to impress people and break ices, but where's the fun in my part? I see more impossibility and requirement to practice in
airflare than the typical magic "tricks" played these days. Yes, I really appreciate good magic especially when performed right and flawlessly (Arnaud Chevrier, anyone?), but for some reason... most of the entertainment value has gone. Is it because of my constant viewing of the same stuff everytime? The lack of reason why things happen in "magic"? Or maybe because there is just not enough relevance anymore of "magic" to the "real world"? For some reason, I like seeing a grandpa pulling a coin out of his kid's ear compared to some magician doing a royal flush trick. Why, because there's more emotion and human interactivity that involves real feeling and continous surprise than finding cards for no apparent reason. May be I think just too philosophical here, but hey... that's my thought.
Yes it takes time and practice, but what for?
So yeah, I think I just need an injection of fun and mind boggling magic into my veins once again. Damnit this reoccurence is killing me sometime hehehehe :)